Monday, October 5, 2015

Quitting is not an option.

It's Monday once again! Monday's are hard for me, it's the day I lost my brother. But I work hard at being strong, and not letting that pain be an excuse.

Last week I reached my original goal weight. I didn't celebrate it or post about it like I thought I would. I think it's because it came, and I realized I wasn't where I want to be. I can do better. I can be better. I can be stronger. I reevaluated my goal weight. I also made goals that have nothing to do about weight, but about strength.

My goal weight, although it's not that important to me what the number on the scale says anymore, is a number I haven't seen {healthily} since I was in middle school. It's not unhealthy, it's not too low for my body. It's actually higher than I could go, because I accounted for muscle I want to put on.

This morning, I just didn't want to get out of bed. My house was cold. My bed was so warm and comfy. I stayed in bed for a few extra minutes savoring the warmth, and then my daughter came in my room and wanted to cuddle, which is rare. I cuddled her for a few minutes. Then, I realized, I am just making excuses. Sure, I could miss my workout. I'm at my original goal weight, actually 1.5 pounds less. Missing one workout isn't going to make a big difference. But it will make it harder to get my workout in tomorrow when it's even colder in my house. I jumped out of bed, did 10 jumping jacks to warm my self up, and then got my workout in. I feel stronger, I feel better.

Quitting isn't an option. I have to remind myself of this as I struggle with depression. It was a tough weekend. I don't want to get into my personal battles too much, but I definitely struggled mentally. I am considering increasing my medication (with my doctors consent of course). I have days I just want to give up, life can seem pointless, but in those moments when I'm at my weakest, is when I need to push the hardest. I can't quit. I have TOO much. I have so many blessings.

YOU can't quit either. No matter what you're working towards, no matter where your progress is at, you can't give up. I've seen what it looks like to quit. I've seen people quit trying, and it isn't good. Remember WHY you started. What helps you continue on when the going gets tough?

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